Selfishness That Makes Sense

Well, my latest book could have saved me years of stress and that nasty panic attack I have mentioned before. Unfortunately, the reality is that I would have ignored it like all that "nonsense" folks tried to beat into me about living a balanced healthy life, stretching, exercising, and on and on and on...

The book is "One Minute for Yourself" by Spencer Johnson. The premise is pretty easy:

• Take a minute several times a day to ask yourself. "Is there a better way, right now, for me to take better care of myself?"
• And asking with regard to our relationships. "Am I asking another person or our relationship to do the impossible--- to take good care of me--- or are we each taking better care of ourselves and thus enjoying an even better relationship together?"
• Then act on taking care of yourself and encourage people you care for to make time to take care of themselves.
• This allows each person to be healthier and happier, therefore the relationship becomes happier.
• As compared to each person expecting the other to "fulfill" them... Which they are not even doing for themselves. (ie impossible)

Now, the brief history or testimonial in hopes of helping people avoid the rather painful path I followed to learn what this short enjoyable fiction book can teach you in about 2 hours.

As a farm boy, I was raised to become a workaholic and put others needs before mine. (ie most of the time) Now this was fine when it was just my parents, wife, kids or work. The problem was that year after year of putting them all before myself became draining. Then of course there were additional kids, additional pets and the work got more demanding. Worse yet, it came on so slowly and gradually that I did not feel the stress growing unbearable. I would have sworn I was doing great until that one day I popped!!! Then I got to learn all about anxiety, depression, SSRIs, counselors, etc. Things that I never ever would have thought "I", Mr stable and in control, would ever need to deal with . (drop me an email if you want more details)

Now as I have said before... This was the best thing that ever happened to me !!! Without it I would not have learned the critical importance of taking care of myself first. And I likely would have been facing some serious health problems in the future.

If you still think that taking "care of" that Parent, Spouse, Employer, Child, etc, is more important than taking care of YOU, keep this in mind. ALWAYS PUT ON YOUR OXYGEN MASK BEFORE HELPING OTHERS !!!! The people you take care of will adjust, though it may be rough for a little while as things shift. However you will then do a much better job of helping and caring for them. I mean who wants to be around a crabby, burnt out, on the edge person...

As always, Dr Johnson tells the story better than I. So check out the book. Thoughts welcome as always.